Blah Blah Blah

Blah blah blah.

I've been missing, but now I'm back.

Blah, blah, blah.

Same old story.

Blah blah blah.

Man! What happened to me? I used to be rather passionate about blogging. And now...pfffffffffft <---That would be the sound that a balloon makes when all the hot air runs out of it. Or in this case...a blogger. Minus the hot air that is.

Speaking of "used to be passionate"...I used to be kind of passionate about weight loss too.

But something happened to me when I got below the 200 mark.

I got comfortable.

It was really lovely to not be 200 something pounds anymore.
And it was really lovely to fit in my clothes.
And it was really lovely to even be able to zip up my wedding dress (and who needs to breathe anyway, right?)
And it has been SUPER lovely hearing all the compliment about how great I look.
And it was lovely lovely being able to eat just about anything I wanted and still maintain my weight.

But all that lovely feels wrong sometimes.

I had a goal. I wanted to reach my pre wedding weight of 175. And while I may be really pleased with losing 80 plus pounds and fitting comfortably in a size 14 and hearing from everyone how fantastic I look...

It boils down to this.

As comfortable as I've been being where I'm at, I'm still not comfortable in my own skin. I still feel "fat". Some might feel I have a skewed view. I believe my dad's words were: "I think you look rather piqued". But by medical definition, at 5'10" and 197.6 pounds (my weight today by the way), I am still a good 30 pounds overweight. My little weight loss journey is far from over. I've been relaxing far too long in Dr. Pepper and Chocolate Land. It's time to get serious again and get back on the bandwagon.

I recently finished P90X and now I'm getting focused on running again. I am in the midst of a 10 week training program for my half marathon zooming right up on me on September 1st. I am really slow. My average mile time is rarely lower than 11 minutes per mile. But I can go the distance. Last Saturday I did a 6 mile run/walk in the morning and stayed busy the rest of the day throwing a cowgirl birthday party for my little 4 year old. The fact that I didn't drop dead, or even feel like dropping dead, during the day felt like an accomplishment to me.

I think my running would go a lot better if I could just get my head back into healthy eating. I've fallen into the pop pit again. It's time to kick the soda habit back into submission. I am trying to track my calories better and work out even on my days off from running. A little cross training never hurt anyone.

My current ultimate goal is to lose that 25 to 30 pounds by the end of the summer. I don't want to carry it with me through that half marathon. It needs to go!! Once upon a time I had enough self control to drop 83.9 pounds. I need that power again. I want to see that 100 pounds lost mark!