About a month ago I was asked to speak at a women's meeting for our church on how I've enjoyed my journey as a wife and mother with an emphasis on going through the healthy life change I have been through over the last couple of years. Talk about being flattered and terrified all at once.
That meeting is tonight and I have just printed off my notes that will help me to somehow relate in ten minutes an almost 32 year long experience to a room full of women. I have had an entire month to ponder on what I would say tonight. It's been a reflective struggle. I couldn't even relate in ten minutes what thoughts I have had over the last month alone, much less the two years of my weight loss journey, much less the 30 years prior.
I was tempted to just pass out a piece of paper with the link to this blog, but I decided to give it a first rate try. And I'm glad I did. This month of pondering has helped me to realize just how far I really have come. Sometimes, it's easy for me to belittle my journey.
"It's just 100 pounds and besides I've gained a bit of it back."
"It's just a marathon. Lots of people run marathons."
"It's just happiness and joy and self-control and confidence that I've gained. No biggie."
As I've struggled to figure out what to say tonight, as I've prayed and pondered, as I've searched through old blog posts and pictures, as I've gone over my final notes, I've thought a lot of thoughts and felt a lot of emotions.
With this bird's eye view of my journey, all laid out in one small chronological map, I've been able to see Point A and Point C as well as the messy, curving, spiraling, dotted Line B.
In the matter of a few minutes I read the post about when I was struggling to "wog" to the end of the block only to then read the post on how I was now running 16 miles, soon to be 26.2 miles.
I found this picture...
And then this picture...
And then it hit me.
I did this. I lost 100 pounds. I kicked obesity in the fanny. I changed my fate. I altered my family's fate too. I did it without anyone pushing me. I ate healthily as I sat by a husband who did not. I have figured out ways to make exercise and healthy eating a daily part of my life. I have planned and sacrificed and pushed and endured. I got out of bed before sunrise over and over again. I made it a priority. I found my inner and outer beauty. I chose happiness. I did it.
And I'm still doing it and I'm hoping to help others do it too.
Not to toot my own horn or anything.
(Can I admit that during this process, more than once, the thought of writing a book came to my mind? Ssshhh.)